Marbled

Smooth and serene
cool to the touch
Translucent you seem
shape that I clutch


With beauty you shine
refractory light
Distorted are lines
before you take flight


Spin till the clash
of attack to your kind
Actions seem rash
though premeditated in mind

A determined goal
for a head wreathed in green
The scuffs that you dole
you mirror, unclean


Now overlooked
for favored perfection
Consumed and discarded
Mr. Brief Satisfaction

The Bar Crawl

A month ago I accompanied two friends for their 21st birthday bar crawls. By the end of both nights, my arms were riddled with stamps. The bars had previously been an unfamiliar scene to me, which made my weekend a refreshing and curious experience. I felt like I was on a quest to get a view of the "true" American night life. I found our enjoyment was inversely proportional to the pretension of the place. Price obviously played into this but more importantly the superior atmosphere and friendliness cemented my conclusion. Though I recommend the more laid back bars, I doubt I could have appreciated them without the preceding fancy ones and the alcohol I drank there. It seems logical that later in the night you will have a better time, especially if the place is relaxing and conducive to casual socialization.

Casual... I think that is the key word. The whole idea of a night on the town is to have casual encounters without expectations. If this is your goal then I think you will see eye to eye with me.

This past weekend I revisited our downtown with a friend from home. This time we started with the dive bar and worked our way up to $9 fancy drinks. Though I'll admit the alcohol was far superior at the nicer place, I still felt the atmosphere was more inviting at the first place. I guess I should mention that my friend disagrees with me but only on the basis that the waiters were cuter and the drinks were tastier. To be honest I think they ripped us off by favoring the sugar content over the alcohol, but I suppose I have different priorities. I guess I can't give you an irrefutable conclusion but I can encourage you to approach the cheap places with a bit less hostility.

Time Allocation

All of my free time has led to a few breakthroughs in pop culture discovery. First and foremost, I am enthralled with the TV series Dexter. It is darkly fascinating while maintaining accessibility. It only took one watch of the pilot for me to want more (which is better than I can say about most of my favorite shows). Though it is depressing at times, it delivers a sick satisfaction along with hints for future growth.

Music is another area I have been focused on as of late. I've been scanning through recent album releases for gems. So far my success has been limited however I found a few which include:
LCD Soundsystem - London Sessions
Daft Punk - Tron Legacy
Morcheeba - Blood Like Lemonade
and the music video...
Kanye West - My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

As a disclaimer I'd like to note that these albums impressed me on a superficial level and some of them are still waiting for a my full critique. I just felt like it was time to share even though I'll have to return with real recommendations...

I usually catch up on my reading while riding the bus so the short winter days have taken their toll on my efficiency. Nevertheless, I am reading an interesting autobiography called Look Me in the Eye about a man with Asbergers. He is an idiot cevant of sorts who delivers a refreshing perspective on life. To me it is proof of human adaptability despite singular shortcomings. It amazes me how the author learns to cope and build himself a niche in an unwelcoming world.

I guess that is all for now other than a reminder to you all that V-Day is here so get those chocolates in the mail. Everyone likes to receive a bit of love. Don't be a taker, share the wealth.

Active Resistance

March on the rise
a taut ribbon and bow.
Riding unbounded growth,
inflated she groans.
Influence the horizon,
battle the bends,
resist, Ferocious.


The stalemate persists.
Anticipated break,
where will you neutralize?
Sweet patience,
you decide.

Hooray for Singledom! (I think)

I officially started off the new year with no identifiable attachments. The boy I had been pseudo dating finally decided that our insecure state of noncommittal wasn't working for him. I am still nursing the idea that we were at a power standstill and it was the only option left for him to come out on top. However, I am also aware that my thoughts on the relationship may stem from bitterness at losing my feeling of control. The area of power is particularly seductive to me.

As fate would have it, ending that chapter came just in time for the new year. To celebrate the occasion in grand style my high school friends and I threw a "Hot and Dangerous" themed party. The evening was ruckus filled, and many a plastic cup was wasted. Thankfully we were conservative when it came to photo documenting our trashy attire. When the clock hit midnight the couples paired off and the rest of us grabbed our pots and pans to alert the neighbors.  Now to finish the story I must digress...

One of my high school friends has been recovering from the worst heartbreak I have yet encountered. Since then her boss developed an undying and an unrequited affection toward her. Though she has expressed this disinterest her actions have kept stringing him along. I think she formed a dependency on having him at her heel despite her rational rejection. Needless to say she is in a precarious emotional state that is only intensified by her predisposition.

Now to continue... For New Year's Eve she invited a boy she was interested in to our party. They hooked up at the stroke of midnight and disappeared outside. Quite a time later she ran back into the house sobbing as the door slammed behind her. Apparently along with the Christian faith he'd adopted while fighting alcoholism, came a determination to save himself for marriage. Unfortunately for my friend, this mindset was incompatible with her goals. The combination of emotion, sexual tension and intoxication led to her ascent onto the table while declaring, "I give no fucks!" From this stage she propositioned kisses for all. She made her way around the room (with the exclusion of one boyfriend) and finished with the song "I Kissed a Girl" being blasted... This may be the closest I'll ever come to a full blown orgy. I don't think I have ever felt so sexually attractive in my life.

Awhile later we found my dear friend asleep upon the throne. She realized her work began in a few hours so she called her poor uninvited boss to come fetch her. After crying to him about boy problems for an hour, he took her home and that was the finish to our wild night. She never made it to work in the morning.

I find it tragic the way women and men have such a difficult time finding equality in mutual relationships. One party is almost always disproportionately invested vs the other because their relationships are so dependency based. When on the receiving end, it is difficult to resist the benefits that come so effortlessly. To make matters worse their sacrifices create a power differential which can be used for further gain. Based on my view that we are inherently selfish, this can become a cyclical safety net. In order to battle this recurring problem I encourage everyone to gain some self-respect. Allowing this to happen by either enabling or taking advantage intensifies the issue. For those of you like me who are inclined to play the system: Though there are some convenient perks to your behavior, it is not in your best interest to indulge. There are always hidden costs such as losing the skills needed to have a healthy relationship, ruining the respect you have from others, developing dependence in your own way overtime, fostering resentment in the other party, etc. So my friends be strong and just say no.

Kiss and Tell

With contrived acquaintance

Comes Isolation's content

Though carefully desired

Convictions are bent.

Indiscreet and improbable

Oh Notch that I've carved

Has crowned this Noble

And has us thus scarred.

A mutual chase

Unknown to the knees

Who's predisposition reveals

An inherent displease.

Doubt dutifully stored

Thy may be benign

Yet through whispers of love

Thy may be divined.

Invite the Pedestal

Despite the conceit

You may know truth

I subsist on Defeat.

It's a Wonderful Time of Year

This week has been packed with excitement and I'm not just talking about the produce.

First and foremost Halloween, a favorite U.S. tradition, was responsible for three consecutive nights of insobriety and merriment (not to mention sugar). Turns out the Sunday date made it better instead of worse. I was impressed with the costume turn out. Way to be creative America.

Secondly, The Giants won the World Series. To put this into perspective I am a fair weather baseball fan however, I am a consistent Texas hater. Therefore the glory brought to California at the expense of Texas was pure joy. Hell Yes.

Thirdly, I voted today. You should too. Just make sure you know what the hell you are voting for. I would be a hypocrite if I claimed that I voted on all measures. As citizens it is as much our responsibility to vote on issues as it is to refrain when we are ignorant. I keep trying to encourage people to put in their say, but always with this as a disclaimer. At any rate, elections are always exciting.

And finally, the produce (how could I resist). I think this is self-explanatory.

Yes indeed it is a wonderful time of year.